Who is this Mikalee Byerman chick, anyhow?

I heart you. You want to know who I am? Aw shucks

Well, here’s the abridged version:

Crazy tall. A type-A grammar geek. The proud mother of two amazing souls who both can say the 50 states in alphabetical order in about 30 seconds flat (because I can, too). A woman with serious, deep-seated insecurities because I can’t roll my tongue like a taco.

But not in that order.

Oh, and you may also be wondering how to say my name. Quick hint: It sounds like Michelob — but with a long “e” sound at the end instead of the “ob.” Try it out loud. Go ahead, you can do it.

Awesome you rock!

Now, maybe you’re more interested in what I do professionally. And that’s easy to summarize in two words: I write. I write about being crazy tall, tongue insecurities and all manner of topics. I write funny, I write serious — doesn’t matter, as long as I’m writing.

So maybe I lied, because I just thought of four more words that describe me professionally: I rock at editing. Whether it’s proofreading for grammar/spelling, checking for AP Style or editing for content, I’m your girl.

Why do I write/edit, you may ask:

  1. Because I can (and don’t you dare be the first to tell me I can’t. That would suck.)
  2. Because I have a master’s degree in journalism, and this seems the thing to do.
  3. Because I’ve been described as a combination of Chelsea Handler (without the affinity for little people) and Erma Bombeck (without the being dead and all). So the only thing I can possibly imagine to do with that is write.
  4. Because my background as a managing editor for magazines has taught me that few people can communicate in writing effectively. I can. Therefore, I do.

What do I write, you may ask next (damn…you’re good at these questions!)…

  1. I am a published author with hundreds of clips and bylines. See a sampling of my articles here.
  2. I’m a blogger (but you already knew that, hence the clicking on my “About” page and all…)
  3. You can peruse my web site for other tidbits here, if you’re so inclined.
  4. Oh yeah, and I’m also writing a book…one silly little blog post at a time. So if you’re an agent, or simply play one on TV…nice to make your “virtual” acquaintance. Call me, k? K…

Thank you for reading. Now leave me a nice comment below — to let me know you stopped by. Otherwise, you just look like a stalker. ;)

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545 Responses to Who is this Mikalee Byerman chick, anyhow?

  1. Carol says:

    Hey-hey! Very nice description. I find your writings greatly stimulating! Waiting anxiously to purchase your book someday!

  2. Nice, informal introduction…kind of liked it…What kind of book are you are writing……Funny…..Serious…..Or……? Anyway….good luck with that…..

  3. orchid says:

    great “about” page.. you are gifted to have such skills in writing and editing, apart from looking awesome :)

  4. You’ve got a pretty nice blog here! Will follow you!

  5. like what you do you have good stuf a prod mom thanks for sharing

  6. terrific with words. continue…

  7. Tony Segale says:

    Mikalee,
    I am new to blogging, just started mine this year. Tonight, I poked around at some of the suggestions on the WordPress main page, stumbled across your blog, got a riot out of reading your ‘Valentine’s Day’ post and had to to check what you are all about.
    My wife and I are not big fans of Valentine’s Day, either, why do you have to express yourself on a day someone else has chose to make a public expression of, and, so,
    you have the dubious honor of being the first blog I intend to follow, if I can find the right button to push.
    Appreciate your writing,
    Tony

  8. missvaleriem says:

    Chelsea Handler meets Lorelai Gilmore …

  9. I wanted to let you know that I nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award! I love your blog, keep at it!

  10. You ARE a terrific writer. Thanks also for checking out my blog.

  11. I am really enjoying your blog. I posted it to My Life. One Story at a Time. facebook page! Now – off to read and enjoy more! Donna

  12. I stopped by! Im not a stalker!!!!!
    ;)

  13. Impower You says:

    This is great, I need more comedy in my day. I have felt a bit deficient since episodes of The Simpsons no longer make me laugh. And if people compare you to Erma Bombeck that’s even better. Do you remember she wrote about christmas newsletters? I don’t know which was funnier, her or the people that took offense on her article.

    On another topic, do you ever write book reviews? I self published a resource book for young women with topics ranging from self defense to beauty image. My goal is to get 500 bloggers to write about it.

    • You know, The Simpsons used to make me laugh, too — not sure exactly what happened. It’s not like the characters are getting too old or anything, right?

      Love love LOVE EB. I’m honored to even be mentioned in the same breath. Now if I can get Nora Ephron in the same breath as well, my life will feel complete…

      I haven’t tackled book reviews yet — not enough time! I’m a full-time freelance writer and I’m trying to publish a book of my own, so time is short in these parts. How was the self-publishing experience for you?

      Thanks so much for stopping by!

  14. I have been emPowered by the Powers that be to exalt upon you the Power and Honor of being the All Powerful and Wise QUEEN of the Versatile Blogger Award. I bow to you my QUEEN. More Power to ya. Enjoy the Power.

  15. evrameekputme says:

    Here is my must leave comment :) Great blog!

  16. Chorwin says:

    Very special self introduction. May be I should re-write mine… mmmm…. should I? :)

  17. Kavi says:

    Very nice intro…keep at the writing :-)

  18. Mona Lisa says:

    I really like your blog! Your wit makes me chuckle out loud and your writing is intriguing. Don’t ever stop writing because I’m highly entertained :)

    • Ah, well thank you!

      I’m so glad you enjoy…and I definitely plan to continue. Especially when I receive great support like that provided by your wonderful comment. Thx again, Mona Lisa!

  19. novyart says:

    Oooh, linky love – we’ll ponder and knead your blog in our brains. Keep up your good works.

  20. Julie Frayn says:

    So, just how crazy tall are you? I come from crazy tall folk, have a 6’7 brother and a 6’5 son who isn’t 18 yet and still has some growin’ left to do. So, just curious… I am a mere 5’10. And somehow, my daughter got stuck at 5’4. :)

    • Wow — you grow them BIG in your family, huh? I’m a hair or two above 6 feet (when others ask, I often say “5-12 and a half,” and I always love the dumbfounded looks…). However, I’m not one to shirk my height, and I always wear heels. So on any given day, I range from 6-2 to 6-3!

      • Julie Frayn says:

        I always wanted to be 6 feet tall. It was a goal I set for myself when I was a teen. Dumb goal, since I had zero control over reaching it… But I too always wear heels, usually 4″ or higher. So really, we are the same height :)

  21. Ok I dont want to be a blog stalker so Hey. Your writing is kinda growing on me, but not like a tumor or anything. Rock on.
    Mike

  22. Lady Khairba says:

    Great blog keep up the good work.

  23. howanxious says:

    You’re cool. Looking forward to reading your already existing blogs and those which come ol from now on. :)

  24. Andy says:

    hey!…. I was going to comment elswhere, but then that last line said I had to post here?….never mind I just popped by to thank you for your comment on my blog, but got waylaid by your style!…. you’re wasted (NOT drunk) here.. you really should be on TV or stage!…..:))

  25. CR says:

    After seeing your comments below almost every FP post I click on, I finally cracked and came over. Turns out we have the editing/proofreading thing in common as well as the basic parenting/blogging/wine-drinking combo. Nice to meet you, & good luck with the book :)

  26. wrands says:

    Great Blog… new follower

  27. deckshoes says:

    I love Erma Bombeck, nice to have found your site!

  28. edremsrola says:

    Woooops. I found my way here and the last thing I desire is to be considered a stalker, so I must leave a comment. Since you’ve really made a point of how crazy tall you are, I find I must ask, how crazy tall are you?

    Now that you’ve read my comment, I do believe you are morally obligated to take a peek at my blog. In fact, I dare ya!

  29. eogyan1 says:

    You really good at writing,& u looking gorgeous too,will love to purchase one of your writings.

  30. Kerry Dwyer says:

    How I stopped by? I found you by looking through wordpress freshly pressed blogs and noticed that you commented a lot so I thought I would come and check you out. Then I noticed you wrote very nicely so I come to your ‘about’ page. Here I found out that you love grammar – and that’s it really. Any friend of grammar is a friend of mine.

  31. ShaneWozEre says:

    You sound like some kind of crazy mad-one. And that’s a good thing in my book – follow

  32. wentworth8022 says:

    OK,
    K,
    Since I am not a stalker I am leaving this brief comment. This is my first visit to your blog and I enjoyed what I read. I will be back for more. I have a question I would like to ask. Out of respect for your clean concise writing style I will wait to better compose my question.

  33. J. Fabulous says:

    As they say in da hood, “Girl, you got mad skillz yo!” Oh, and taco tongue is highly overrated. Boy, could my blog use an editor! My writing is so….well, so so.

    You are such a talented and entertaining writer that I’ve been compelled to add you to the blogs I read so I don’t miss another pithy word that comes out of your computer. Like I have time for this! Sheesh! My work will just have to suffer.

  34. fivereflections says:

    hello nice to meet you
    David in Maine USA

  35. Elena says:

    guess all people deal with issues of betrayal in different ways.. humor is not the worst of them.

    good luck getting over it.

    el

  36. An interesting blog… probably I will come around again. By the way, “stalker” probably
    doesn’t have only one meaning? As my maternal language is not english I am not sure
    however it seems to me that “stalker” is not necessary a bad guy. Anyway, as I have left this comment I am not a stalker :)

    • Too funny — thanks for the cultural perspective! In my culture, a stalker is inherently a creepy person. But I’m just teasing about the fact that if you don’t leave a comment, you look like a stalker…trust me!

      Thank you for stopping by!

  37. Chandu says:

    What an introduction madam. Its awesome! :)

  38. Sam says:

    You said, you are a “type-A grammar geek”! I wish I was one because I am good with numbers like math and physics, but really bad at writing. Your kids must be very proud to have a mom who can teach them grammar because I would be for sure. LOL

    Anyway, I wish you all the best and be back on your site in the future.

    • Not sure — think I’d be far happier being good with numbers like math and physics than writing…I can’t help my kids with their math homework for the life of me!

      Thank you SO MUCH for stopping by!

  39. scottrandall says:

    Great introduction! I’m glad I found your site (and that you found mine)! I’m also glad that you didn’t edit my post…. :-)

  40. Someone says:

    Gah! An inspiration, indeed. My next question would be, are you a gemini?!

  41. Anne says:

    OK, so you got me laughing on a day when I didn’t think it was possible..I’ll be back (and I’m NOT a stalker!)

  42. hi and greetings from across the pond! i read ur title page….and it made me feel so sad! why? i know where ur coming from…about separation etc etc…it can, and does destroy lives…but hey…come on…in my experience, everything is transitory (am i sounding like the buddha already, jeez!)…if there’s one thing i learnt in life, its that everything changes…nothing stays the same…so shucks….yeah, life can stink sometimes, but…tomorrows another day…who cares…and who cares what anybody else thinks too…as long as ur happy! your are very, very talented..writing is one of my loves too..when i can get the time! but youre gonna go places…and your looks will puch you even further….i feel it…so write, write, write….one day your books will be stocked by amazon…and i’ll be your first buyer!

    • I’m nominating your comment for “Best. Comment. EVER!”

      Thank you so much — for the support, encouragement and perspective. You sound wise indeed.

      Now I’ll be in touch once Amazon stocks my first book, k?
      ;)

  43. sunsetwave says:

    Hey, I love your blog! You’re writing style is unique, and I love it!

  44. Adam Barr says:

    Mikalee is you. Mikkeli is a town in Finland. Where I have actually been. In the summer, when it was 82 degrees. Nice people, the Finns, but they have no idea what to do when it’s 82 degrees. It happens, like, once every 10 years. I was working on releasing the screws on the locked window of my un-air-conditioned hotel room window with a dime.

    But the summer part was cool…never darker than early dusk, even at 4 a.m. Streets deserted, walking around in the eerie quiet…

    Mapquest: http://www.mapquest.com/#b0a8795984f4edafe5d23dac

    • This is the coolest thing ever. I had no idea. But I can’t find the pronunciation anywhere…do you know if it’s pronounced like my name? (Michelob minus the -ob plus an -ee?)

  45. michads says:

    Talk about insecurities… I thought about leaving a real comment, but after reading what you do, was worried that I would get critiqued! J/K :)

  46. Islamopedia says:

    Just stumbled across your blog accidentally, but I am glad that I did, as I really enjoyed reading your posts.

    Feel sorry for some of the trauma that you’ve had to go through, but at least your using it as a learning experience and helping others by posting it on your blog.

    Stay positive.

    Jashim

  47. jesusvasquez says:

    You caught me, I was trying to say out loud “Mikalee”, and you’re right!! “I do rock”, he he. Like your post so much. It was so motivating. I’ve always had a necessity to write but can’t really doing, I think it’s because a haven’t all my objectives clear enough. This post clears my mind, in some way. I’ll write down my objectives and necessities first, so I can keep them in mind once I start writing.

    Keep being you,

    Jesus.

    • Can I tell you how much I LOVE the fact that Jesus just commented on my blog. Thank you for making me smile!

      Objectives are important — but sometimes, you just need to let your voice guide you. What drives you? What makes you passionate? What do you absolutely NEED to say? I’d suggest you start there.

      Thank you so much for stopping by…

  48. nilver says:

    This is really good reading material! I’ll use your blog to improve my english as well as I’ll have fun reading it, thank you!

  49. adambarr1106 says:

    Yes, pronounced exactly like that.

  50. Dounia says:

    This is a fantastic about page! I’ve actually been to your blog several times, and yet somehow didn’t subscribe any of those times…Not sure why, since I know I’ve been missing out! ;) Will definitely be subscribing now, because I really enjoy your blog immensely!

  51. Logan says:

    You have a way with words….

    All the Best for the book you are working on. :)

  52. Very interesting writer and blogger !

  53. Wow! – you have recently had a rough time – intruders and all. You are one brave lady.
    Carl (uk)

  54. Very nice – all of it. I’m new to blogging, but I like what you’ve done here. So, I’ll be following along. =)

  55. dheadd says:

    Wow! I love your writing. It is very stimulating for sure. Usually I get very bored quickly, especially with long posts. Definitely interested your book.

  56. talleygilly says:

    Hi Mikalee – Very nice to meet you and I look forward to catching up on your blog (added to my “follows”! Just read your first post and a big Congratulations. You had me fooled with the break-up story. I’m a sucker for a happy ending and so excited you are getting yours, even if there is no Alice the maid. -Alexandra

    • Damn the luck, though — Alice the maid would make it all PERFECT!

      Thank you so much for “following” … I’m absolutely thrilled you’re here and along for the journey. Nice to meet you as well!

  57. kafkaesque777 says:

    Hey…..You’ve got a style of writing that i’ve never imagined possible till now…..and yes i mean that in a good way. I would love to read the book once its pulished so let us all know loud and clear. Seriously hope that you’ll pack a lot of humour into it cause its definitely you’re strong point….Best of luck for everything ahead.I’ll be watching,sorry reading

    • Wow — what a kind compliment! Thank you for taking the time to comment, and for reading my silly little musings. I’m honored that you’re interested in the book — I’ll definitely let you all know when it’s available!

      • Hey,would you check out my blog? I’d love the feedback….

        • I really enjoy your quirky take on life — I think the site is a kick! I did wish you had an “About” page (the mini-profile doesn’t tell me enough about you… I *heart* good “About” pages). And it looks like you’re quite the prolific writer, which is an amazingly good thing — except that once you start getting subscribers, they’ll only want updates at MOST once a day. It’s possible you’re just posting a lot up front to give readers a reason to read (say that 10 times fast), which is just fine. Just thought I’d mention that in case you’re able to keep up that kind of posting schedule.

          Congrats on the new blog!

          • There is an about page….at least the last time i checked there was. And by the way ,i’m really sorry that Life is putting you through the wringer …..i know how that feels like. My first best friend just ended our friendship and even after 9 months i’m still kinda not over it. I’m not sure whether you’re a christian ,or even if you believe in God or not . But i am a serious christian and i will be praying for you ,Brett and the kids. Especially the kids.

            • Huh…I just went again, and I don’t see a separate “About” page (usually the link appears at the top of the blog — or at least that’s where most people check for it). If it’s there, my apologies…it is 4 o’clock in the morning, and I’ve been up and sleepless since 1 a.m. (insomnia…gotta love it!).

              Anyhow, thank you so much for the kind words. I’m thrilled about many aspects of my life, but the upheaval the kids feel always weighs on me (especially, it would seem, between 1 and 4 a.m.). Your prayers are much appreciated!

              And I’m sending healing thoughts your way, too — a “divorce” of any kind is very hard to process, and it sounds like you’re going through it as well. :(

              • Yeah..i’d just changed the theme of my blog and the new one didn’t have an about page. So i just went and rewrote it again .I think getting some shut eye would be a good idea for you. Thanks for the thoughts ,i can feel the healing vies already….

  58. beebeesworld says:

    Thank you for reading my “Legacy” story, and for your kind comment. I will follow your blog and hope you will follow my blog as well. Best wishes,beebeesworld

  59. Meag says:

    I randomly found myself on your blog and have to let you know that I will continue to stop by to read your posts. I love your witty remarks. You have your own sort of humor that is definitely one-of-a-kind. Keep up the good work!

  60. Julie DeNeen says:

    I found you via another blog, and was intrigued by your blog to book idea. I am doing the same and always looking for people to connect with. Love your writing! Will be following you :)

    • Well thank you very much! It’s great to connect with other writers exploring the same concepts — I’m actually thinking of starting yet ANOTHER blog to tackle the whole blog-to-book process. Stay tuned, and I’m SO glad you’re here!

  61. catsworld1 says:

    Thank you for commenting on “Turn where??”. I too am a grammar geek and deplore the inattention paid by many people who think they can write when it comes to their grammar, composition and spelling. I’ve written rants before about the state of the English language in today’s world. The most recent was “Has proper English become a quaint concept?”

    • Corrie Snorthwatson says:

      I stumbled upon this while searching parallel parenting (which is what my son’s dad keeps suggesting) and I love your take on it. After a drunken one might stand (following a leap from a balcony) I conceived my gorgeous son. After 4 years of solo parenting, his dad decided to make an appearance and now has him 50% of the time. Your blog has had me rolling all day and has made me feel so much less alone.

  62. vagabondwithfamily says:

    Impressed I am by this intro! You’ve surely got a way with words, yourself! Again, thanks for your responding to my Synchronized piece!

  63. Alicia says:

    Hi Mikalee,

    My name is Alicia Franklin and I am currently completing my Doctorate in Clinical Psychology at the Australian National University. I am writing to you in the hope that my research into relationship break-ups will be of interest to you and your readers.

    Approximately 30% of people deal with the pain of a relationship break-up each year – making it one of the most common, traumatic events in people’s lives. Yet amazingly, very little is understood about how people cope with this highly stressful experience.

    As part of my research, I recently launched an online study investigating how people deal with the breakdown of a relationship. Results of this study will assist psychologists in better understanding and assisting people who struggle with relationship break-ups in the future.

    As your blog is clearly dedicated to helping people cope with a range of life issues – I thought that you may consider assisting me in getting the word out about our research. In return for your generosity, I would be more than happy to write an article for your blog and/or share the results of our study with your readers at the end of the year.

    If you are interested in supporting our research, it would be wonderful if you could post a link to ‘The Break-Up Study’ on your blog along with a brief introductory paragraph that I have included below.

    Please let me know if you would like to discuss this further or require any additional information.
    I very much look forward to hearing from you.

    Best Wishes,

    Alicia Franklin

    INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAPH AND STUDY LINK:

    If you have experienced a relationship break-up then you are probably familiar with the distress, disorientation and upheaval that often occurs when we are faced with the end of a relationship.

    It is estimated that 1 in 3 of us experience the pain of a relationship break-up each year. Yet amazingly, little is known about how people deal with this highly stressful event.

    The Break-up Study, would like to gather information about your experiences, reactions, and attempts to cope with the breakdown of a romantic relationship. The results will enable Clinical Psychologists to better understand and assist people who struggle with break-ups in the future.

    If you have experienced a relationship breakdown within the last year and would like to help, please take the time to fill out a brief online survey by clicking on the link below. This study is being run by the Australian National University and is anonymous and confidential.

    Thank you for your kind support

    Study link: https://anupsych.us.qualtrics.com/SE/?SID=SV_8JtbrkBrhGCWkUl
    Or visit ‘The Break-Up Study on Facebook.

  64. The Guat says:

    I know I’ve already stopped by here and I’ve been checking out your site and cracking up at all your old posts. Just wanted to say that I’ve nominated you for the Addictive Blog Award. You can come by and check it out if you wish :)

    http://thewishfactor.wordpress.com/2012/09/24/sometimes-addiction-is-a-good-thing/

  65. Tales from the motherland brought me to your ‘Me 2.0″ post and I adored it ahah, during the middle part I was wondering if i was going insane because that’s a very odd, uhm, unique way of grieving over a lost boyfriend, and whether or not motherland had gone amiss to introduce you with glee on her post.. but the ending was absolutely adorable ! (: Congratulations , from future stalker.

  66. kitchenmudge says:

    Five months since your last post. We’re really jonesing out here, Mikalee.

  67. Impressive body of work! I always see your comments on others’ posts from freshly pressed, so I thought I would check it out!

    Cheers to you, and nice work!
    Courtney Hosny
    http://www.oneweektocrazy.com

  68. Pingback: Turn the Page | Stuphblog

  69. bcpkid says:

    Just out of curiousity are you planning a Kindle-like self published book, or a publishing-house doohickey?
    Thanks.

  70. S. Davenport says:

    Found your blog doing a google search about parallel parenting. Have been reading it as much as possible the last day. I can’t make this up: My 9 year old granddaughter was taken by her stepmother for a 9 year old exam and had her vagina examined. Without any notification at all to her mother, my daughter. Stepmom and father say this is a normal part of a 9 year old exam. My granddaughter had no warning this was going to happen, and knows her mom can’t protect her from the step. She will never forget this. Grammie

  71. mandimon says:

    Awesome to have stumbled across your blog today via a shared acquaintance on Facebook…looks like we live in the same city :) I’ve loved stalking your blog!! Can’t wait to read more and follow the life of a “real grown up” writer since I spend my time trying to pretend I’m one :)

  72. Really, not commemting makes me a stalker? Guess I better comment then.

    Err, hi, you write nicely.

    (It didn’t have to bea funny/incitful/clever comment did it?

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